Voices on the Wind Voices on Aging
Hard to deny (from Pound Laundry) by Michael Gregory Hard to deny that intellect may be as one swerve of the yin-yang would have it a cruel product of constraints on male bodies, barely if at all aware of the images being constructed in less rational cells that inform mental and bodily actions a rationality that works by means of impersonal organization of formal rules founded on control of an object-world enforced by all the binary oppositions — public/private objective/empathetic justice/compassion self/not-self misusing for instance what it supposes to be the more fluid malleable as yet unspent potential of femaleness — a utopia-desiring production lying fallow intact undirected not yet socially defined thus closer to the unknowable unconscious there to encode their own desires their own paradisos the object of eros no longer even the image once the poet’s joy but now instead (since imagination the site of love was ruled unreal for dealing in counterfeit means of exchange: image of an image of an image) the ever unattainable cogito — male desire for women having little to do with actual women but part of the unending search for a territory of satisfied longing. * Several months before birth, chemicals naturally part of the fetal environment induce their brains to grow centers of meaning will and communication larger than their brothers’ making them more adept from an early age at mimicry of others’ body language freely mirroring in their own bodies and sense-of-self the differences of others even in early infancy exercising the gift of looking long into others’ eyes earlier and more perceptively reading faces for signs of danger — aggression, especially — prone their whole lives to empathy intuition the magic some say of reading others’ minds and states of mind feelings intentions — wanting to make connections organize and orchestrate the world so they feel more at home in it feeling themselves failures if they don’t — taking it upon themselves to seek more earnestly for gentle means to avoid avert quiet and settle disputes peacefully amicably and using three times more words to do it their brains at the other end of the line shrinking more slowly — in particular the hippocampus fusiform gyrus temporal lobe the prefrontal white matter the centers for concentration memory listening language emotions and making decisions. * eros/amor quest for the beloved the image the lover has in mind embodied orexis/appetitus a moving toward a compulsion a craving to have and to hold mania/insania obsession jealousy possession by imbecile demons epithymia pangs of desire hunger lust concupiscentia pleonexia/cupiditas a clinging to thus recreating the mundane philia/amicitia familial recognition a fellow feeling agape/caritas love thy neighbor without expecting reciprocity pothos/desiderium a fond regret a yearning after a longing for storge/dilectio companionship a slowly developing mutual affection pragma taking to heart pragmatics the loved one’s station in society eusebeia/pietas awe reverence service to the divine loid/ludus a playful game-like manner lovers might adopt to their greater joy * but then a generation of lovers thinking less of each other than of the relationship a geometry of love where size shape and obliquity signal levels of involvement: degrees of mismatch for instance — real and unreal or how we think the other feels about us and how the other does feel about us or how we would like the other to feel or what each thinks the other thinks reality is or is to be or what you want and what you think you are getting out of the relationship